Well that's that

So I just dropped off Isaac at O'Hare. Sad times. It was great having him around. And it's been great having everyone else in town. Originally I thought it would be fun to have everyone in town at the same time, but in retrospect, I kinda wish I would have had one person up at a time. I didn't really have any one on one time with anyone. And I was so busy that I was always tired.

I was really happy at the new year. Hopeful. Expectant. Optimistic. Etc. But. . .all of that is gone now. But at least I made it about a month. The thought that went the deepest on my way back from the airport was that I just want to be hugged. I mean like really good and hugged. But that isn't going to happen anytime in the near future. But. . . .

So while typing that mike started playing a new song of ours and morgan picked up one of my hand drums and tried desperately to play and sing at the same time. momentary good times :)

Anyway, what I was going to say was that when you feel like you need a hug just cry a bit. Because then you feel completely emptied and it's as if there is nothing left of you for someone to hug even if there was a someone. The best cries are ones where, instead of using the tears from your tear ducts, you use the tears that have been building up in your heart over the months, or sometimes years (I am incredibly sorry for the emo-ness of that. I'm kicking myself for even thinking it).

I remember when alone seemed romantic. Turns out it just feels tragic.

Son of a . . . I can't keep writing this stuff. I gotta stop before this gets even more ridiculous than it already is (although I'm not convinced it's even possible).

Here's to looking back at this whole thing as a pathetic phase.

God bless us, everyone